Mango Pickle

Hannah's gone away for a week in New Orleans... without me. Before settling down in front of the television to mope, I decided to take advantage of her absence to enjoy two of my favorite forbidden foods: mangoes and pickles. She's allergic to mangoes, so I keep them out of the house when she's around. And for reasons I will never understand, the one food she just will not eat is an Indian-style pickle. Why, Hannah? They're so mouth-watering and spicy.

Some pickle recipes take days, weeks or months to fully mature. This one is quick and easy, leaving you more time to contemplate your dreary, solitary existence.

Ingredients
1 mango
1-3 teaspoons cayenne pepper (as much as you can stand)
1/2 teaspoon fenugreek powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
2 tablespoons canola oil
1 tablespoon mustard oil (if you can't get any, use canola oil)
1/2 teaspoon turmeric
1 teaspoon mustard seeds
pinch of asafoetida
10 curry leaves (optional)

Peel the mango and cut it into small pieces, discarding the pit. Mix the mango chunks, cayenne pepper, salt and fenugreek powder together in a glass jar. Heat the canola and mustard oil in a small pan. When hot, add the mustard seeds, turmeric, curry leaves and asafoetida. Once the mustard seeds pop, pour the mixture over the mango chunks and stir gently. Allow the pickle to mellow for at least an hour, then consume with rice and curry, at a table set for one. I'm not crying, I swear, this pickle is just really spicy.